Fear IS What’s Holding You Back

 

As I sit here from this cafe I love working out of here in Mexico, I feel a light breeze graze across my back, bringing the smell of the ocean with it.

It feels refreshing and full of life. It reminds me of the beauty in our ever changing lives. I know this may sound ridiculous that I’m even comparing life to a breeze but think about it… how ridiculous is it really?

Think about it. Life is about those moments that remind you that you’re alive not just on auto pilot.

You may be sitting comfy in a place in the heat and that moment that the door opens and you get that shiver of a draft it wakes you up right? In that moment it breaks your auto pilot and you remember that you’re ALIVE. That mere moment of temperature change wakes you right up, even just for a minute.

What I’m getting at is the fact that most of us are on autopilot. We wake up, we go to work, come home, have sex with our partners and then do it all over again.

Here’s the thing, why are we so content on that life? Why are we so okay with doing the exact same thing over and over? Why are we so fine with settling?

We stay in dead end jobs that we hate, stay with partners who don’t fulfill us, live in the same city we always have but meanwhile we’re all dreaming of a better job, a better home or city, a better partner.

The reason we all stay in these situations is simply because of fear. Fear is what drives us to remain the same, to stay on autopilot, to not live.

We question, what if a new job will also suck, what if the next person I get into a relationship with also doesn’t fill up my emotional gas tank. What if I move to the city of my dreams and don’t make it or don’t make friends?

Guess what. Do you know what FEAR is? FEAR is False Expectations Appearing Real.

FEAR ISN’T REAL! It’s not, it’s all in your head and it’s time to get out of your head and start Living.

This FEAR is holding you back

It’s time to wake up, it’s time to feel alive.

How the fuck are you gonna do that? Well, you’re gonna fucking just do it, just like that. Rip that bandaid off and fucking do it. Live and I mean really live.

My mom always raised me to never be a dreamer and to always do what I dream of. She says, “be a doer not a dreamer, I hate dreamers”. She never let us settle for complacency.

And that’s what I want you to do. Wake up and look at your life. REALLY look at your life.

Stop dreaming and start doing.

Let’s take your temperature, where are you on auto pilot?

­If it’s your job well get your shit in order and look for the job of your dreams. I know it sounds super hard and scary. But be brave. I don’t care how old you are, it’s never too late to start living. Don’t you want to enjoy the place that you spent 40+ hours a week at?

Don’t you want to feel like you’re fulfilling your purpose whatever that may be? You can do it, and you can do it right now. Get on Indeed and start looking. Now is the best time there ever is.

­That vacation you’ve always wanted to go on, well go. Save your money and fucking go.

Life is about making memories. If you’re sitting behind a desk all the time what memories are you making? If you can’t afford your dream vacation, go on a weekend trip to somewhere similar. You want to go to the west coast, go to Vegas. Flights and hotels are

always cheap. You want to go to NYC but you can’t afford it, go to New Jersey and take the path train into NYC. You want to go somewhere tropical but can’t afford to go out of the country, well go to Miami or the florida keys.

There’s always a way and there’s always an option.

Get away from your desk and go somewhere. That re­-charge will help you revive and feel so much more alive. Why do you think all these new companies have mandatory vacation days? Employee’s are 90% happier and more productive when they have chances to take time off. Book that flight, plan that road trip. Nothing is stopping you from going somewhere, even just for a day.

­How’s your relationship? Does he excite you? Does he show you yourself so that you can be better or does he criticize your every move? Does he support your goals? Does he want to meet your friends, spend time with your family if that’s your thing? If not, well listen, loving someone is just not enough to stay with them.

Let me let you in on a little secret… you can love anyone, just as hard, just as strong. Of course it will always be different but this person needs to excite you, be your mirror to help you see yourself, to be your cheerleader and literally your partner. If they aren’t that, you are settling. Settling is never okay. Auto pilot is never okay. I know it’s super hard, but get out and get out now if you’re not fulfilled. You will never be able to live your life fully until you’re fulfilled in every aspect of your life. So evaluate where you are at and then get out if it’s not up to par with what makes you really feel alive.

I know it’s hard and it would of course be sad, but you only have one life as cliche as that sounds.. don’t waste your time with someone who isn’t helping you grow and feel alive.

And guess what, you’ve always dreamed of moving out of your town to that city. You will make it in any place you choose, and yes it may take time to get your bearings, but that unsettling feeling is growth happening deep in the molecules of your soul. Don’t you want to meet new people and see other ways of living? You never want to look back at your life and wish you lived in that big city.

You can make it, you can you just have to do it and I mean really do it.. the only thing stopping you is you.

Listen, what I’m basically telling you here is that settled feeling, that autopilot will never help you grow. How can you grow if you don’t expand your horizons? If you don’t get out of your comfort zone?

Comfort zone breeds complacency, it doesn’t breed change.

Autopilot, breeds just living your daily routines and not feeling Alive.

Don’t you want to feel alive? Don’t you want to move to that city, find a partner that excites you, go on that vacation, find your dream job?

It’s time, it’s time for a change, that burst of fresh air, that breeze across your back. It can feel your yearning for change. Do it. Do it now.

Right now is your time. Start living and you will feel alive.